An ode to all the awkward things worth talking about it
I wasn't born awkward, but I grew into it rather well. From unruly hair to clumsy feet. From bifocals to fibroids. From saying the right thing at the wrong time, to saying nothing at all.
My parents say I came into this world fast and furious with little patience and a whole lot of stubbornness. Those early photos show a precocious and happy child. No awkwardness in sight.
As time wore on though, my hair grew crazier, my smile stretched wider, and my glasses got thicker. I was second of five, four years behind my sister. She of the straight hair and narrow hips. As my sister perfected her pre-IG poses, I rebelled and flailed my skinny limbs and laughed uproariously. With open mouth, of course. Until the dreaded tongue crib and braces came.
Harder than it looks
In rom coms and sitcoms, awkward humans do all the awkward things but never get fired, they fall in love, and they manage happy, albeit clumsy lives.
But being awkward in real-life isn't so charming.
I've tripped hard in public, fallen in fancy places, slammed into people, spilled and been spilled upon. My body has rebelled in humiliating ways–from bleeding through white pants to showing up at my surgeon's office with a dog towel wrapped around my waist. And then still leaking a puddle on his floor.
This is all normal, right?
“If we are not regularly deeply embarrassed by who we are, the journey to self-knowledge hasn’t begun.” philosopher Alain de Botton
Yet, with all the humor and psychology meant to calm us down, many of us still struggle to acknowledge the uncomfortable things. Instead, we're embarrassed, we're inconvenienced, we're mortified. We're intensely unforgiving with ourselves. We feel awkward because we are awkward.
Own your own
At 50+, I feel like I'm coming into my own. In great part, because I have a partner in the #hothusband. While I would prefer to hide in a dark closet after one of my escapades, he instead dusts me off, helps me change my clothes, and straightens me back up.
I'm also learning to talk about things. It's taken me a good bit, but I am actually realizing I won't be struck down because I've fallen down. Awkward things happen to us all, so let's talk about them. Share them. Awkwardness loves company.
This is a celebration of awkward things.
There's more to say
If you're trying to overcome your weird or learn how to best embrace it, much can be found on the subject.
Cringeworthy: A Theory of Awkwardness, by Melissa Dahl
Awkward: The Science of Why We're Socially Awkward and Why That's Awesome, by Ty Tashiro
With Friends Like These, a podcast with Ana Marie Cox
And of course, we'll talk about it here. Share your stories and I'll share mine. Just a warning: there will be a lot of talk about periods and hysterectomies and menopause. It doesn't get much more awkward than a good pair of white pants on an unexpectedly bad day.
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